March 29, 2006
My Mother Taught Me...1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!
(I dint write this)
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A nice quote I read at the end of a story today :
'Change is not always the worst thing that can happen. Sometimes, it is just what we need the most.'
March 14, 2006
Himesh Reshmiya's Cartoon by MTV Fully Faltoo
SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor.
COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
NAZISM:
You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you.
AN EGYPTIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are voting for Hosni Mubarak!!!!
DUBAI SYSTEM:
You have two cows. You create a website for them and advertise them in all magazines. You create a Cow City or Milk Town for them. You sell off their milk before the cows have even been milked to both legit and shady investors who hope to resale the non-existent milk for a 100% profit in two years time. You bring Tiger Woods to milk the cow first to attract attention.
QATAR SYSTEM:
You have two cows. They've been sitting there for decades and no one realizes that cows can produce milk. You see what Dubai is doing; you go crazy and start milking the heck out of the cow in the shortest time possible. Then you realize no one wanted the milk in the first place.
SAUDI SYSTEM:
Since milking the cow involves nipples the government decides to ban all cows in public. The only method to milk a cow is to have a cow in on one side of the curtain and the guy milking the cow on the other.
BAHRAIN SYSTEM:
You have two cows. Some high government official steals one, milks it, sells the milk and pockets the profit. The government tells you there is just one cow and not enough milk for the people. The people riot and scream death to the government and carry Iranian flags. The Parliament, after thinking for 11 months, decide to employ ten
Bahrainis to milk all the cows at the same time so cut back on unemployment.
LEBANON SYSTEM:
You have two cows. One is owned by Syria and the other is controlled by the government.
March 12, 2006
More paid parking spaces created"We have already started a new study on the parking needs of Dubai. Through this study, which will finish in July, Dubai's parking problems and needs will be studied.
Need I say anything?
"We have created the new paid parking zones after conducting comprehensive studies related to the parking needs of particular areas," said Mehdi Ali, Director of the Parking Department at the RTA.
A comprehensive study has already taken place - as a result of which they installed more parking meters, so what study - in which they will study- will finish in july?
"Projects to solve parking problems will be launched based on the results of the study," he said.
If parking meters were installed as a result of the comprehensive study, what are they gonna launch? parking city?
"Our objective is not to make money (pun intended??) but to provide facilities for traders and residents. Paid parking also helps prevent motorists from double parking, blocking spaces and parking on pavements," Ali said.
How many parking meters have prevented ppl from placing their cars a little above the rest?
HASSLE-FREE
Tickets to be renewed via mobile phones
"They won't have to rush to buy a new ticket. It will give them peace of mind and save them from unnecessary parking fines."
I'm really curious about this. Any Idea how this is gonna work out? How would the time on my ticket, lying on my dashboard, change while I renew it over the mobile?
March 08, 2006
Another Tag...After exactly one week from starting my Blog, I have been tagged by Destitute Rebel. So here goes:
Four jobs I've had:
1: Marketing Intern
2: Accounts Assistant
3: Choreographer
4: Customer Relationship Marketing Specialist - Database Marketing
Movies I could watch over and over:
Taal, Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, Face Off, Andaz Apna Apna, Sound Of Music
you'd seldom find me watching any 'latest' movie, more of music person and very less of movies.
The Only Place I've lived in:
Dubai (ok at times sharjah too)
Five TV shows I like:
1: Friends
2: Everybody Loves Raymond
3: Baa Bahu Aur Baby
4: Scrubs
5. Oprah
Four places I've been to on holiday:
1: Pune
2: Goa
3: Mumbai
4: Lonavla/Khandala
Four favorite dishes:
1. Anything Paneer, Paneer and lots of Paneer
2. Methi Matar Malai
3. Sandwiches
4. Kadi
You know, I could just go on ... I LOVE FOOD
Four sites I visit frequently:
None in particular, depends on what I feel like reading/browsing. Got regular set of newsletters coming to my Inbox from people.com, chicken soup for the soul, ITP, Cinestar etc. For News, I read gulfnews, zawya, cnn, reuters, etc.
Books I've read:
ok I never seem to remember both the Authors and the Books name but I started with Enid Blyton, moved on to Ann M. Martin, then loads of Chicken Soup for the Soul books, numerous books by Robin Cook and other Medical Thrillers/Suspence Thrillers who's Author's or books names I dont remember, Something for the Weekend, Who Moved My Cheese? and Lastly but not the least, Archies was always there!
Bloggers that will be tagged with this:
I take the initiative to end the line of 'Tags' right here, before it gets all lame and boring! Ok chal, lets just tag Gautam
March 02, 2006
with increasing rents in Dubai......*the* Solution!
March 01, 2006
e-Gate facilities at Airportsokay, I may be wrong but clear me out on this one.
'He said after the full implementation of the system and introduction of electronic National Identity Cards for all UAE residents, the entire immigration procedures would be done electronically using smart cards.'
I don’t travel much but this is what I collect:
e-gate system at the Airports is a smart card you are provided with , which you can swipe through a gate, hence reading/recording all your data, instead of waiting at the immigration counters.
Scenario: Mr. xyz, is on his way to (enter country that does not have e-gate system) from
On Arrival in (enter country that does not have e-gate system), oh boy, line! ok , he waits, as he approaches the counter officer, hands over the passport to the officer, who looks at him suspiciously says 'where’s your stamp?', Mr. xyz : what stamp?; The officer calls in the ground security and they take him in.
A confused Mr. xyz is taken into custody and is charged with entering the country illegally. Mr. xyz then realises that the e-gate system dint require his passport to be stamped (exit/entry from/to a country stamp in your passport) at the
Since (enter country that does not have e-gate system) don’t have provision for such a system and are unsure of what he was saying, held him in for say 3 hours at the airport as a result of which Mr. xyz bribes them and flees the airport having to throw away his e-gate card that probably cost him AED 200-300.
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